Tuesday, January 30, 2007

This laugh is for someone(s) today.....

Children's Science Exam Answers.

Q: Name the four seasons.
A: Salt, pepper, mustard, and vinegar.

Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink.
A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep, and canoeists.

Q: How is dew formed?
A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.

Q: How can you delay milk turning sour? (brilliant, love this !)
A: Keep it in the cow.

Q: What causes the tides in the oceans?
A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature hates a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.

Q: What are steroids?
A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.

Q: What happens to your body as you age?
A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.

Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
A: He says good-bye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.

Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes
A: Premature death.

Q: How are the main parts of the body categorized? (e.g., abdomen.)
A: The body is consisted into three parts - the brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain; the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels, A, E , I, O, and U.

Q: What is the fibula?
A: A small lie.

Q: What does "varicose" mean? ( love this one...)
A: Nearby.

Q: Give the meaning of the term "Caesarean Section"
A: The Caesarean Section is a district in Rome

Q: What does the word "benign" mean?'
A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight.

13 comments:

Anonymous said...

LOL!!! LOL!!!

Excellent!!!

Dave said...

Sorry Karen that was me above....clicked on publish before I had put my details in!! DOH!!

Missy said...

HAHAHAHA! THANK YOU!
Laughed so hard my kids ran upstairs to see what was wrong with me.

karen said...

heehee!!

Kansas Bob said...

I think I saw a few of these on Leno's Jaywalking segment - some older kids wouldn't know these either :)

Bruce said...

Sweet!

B~

Don R said...

As a teacher, been there......those are great!

karen said...

yeah, and as a sub...I've learned NOT to have elementary kids describe their artwork.

pearlie said...

hahaha! these are good!

Zanne said...

thanks, needed a laugh!!!
incredible to imagine that kids are that educated these days... scary eh? lol.

karen said...

hey, zanne....thanks for stopping by! where's your blog?

karen said...

hmmmm...think some blogs are down...

pearlie said...

Yup, quite some blogs are down including mine -- but I think they are ok now, at least mine is.