O, whaddarollercoaster!

I'm on my short course of prednisone, and man. . . it messes with me! I have two days of in-school suspension duty tomorrow. Why did I take that? God told me, I guess. I'm actually looking forward to it, but hope that the cortisone doesn't cause inability to control my emotions, or overexaggerates them. Yesterday, I was tagging along with some very large gangsta types (they made me look petite!) in some classes at a high school. I complimented one of them on the crucifix he was wearing and he explained that his dad gave it to him; his late father. I asked what happened, and he said his dad was murdered. This subbing stuff is bigger than I thought it would be. I just don't like the higher paying teacher subbing as much as the special needs stuff. Guess I'm where He wants me to be; it's painful, but at the end of the day, I feel that I've been useful as opposed to being a babysitter.

I was talking to my friend last night. Her dad passed away this week. He was, frankly, a horrible man; her family is at her from all sides trying to get her up to the service, to respond, etc. She has honored him by breaking the generational curse of all kinds of abuse. I stand with her, and support her feelings. She is a testimony to love, to courage, to faithfulness.

I just sometimes wonder what God is thinking? The old question; is God doing this? Nah. We know the cause of evil and suffering on Earth. He is there for all of us; to pick us up and brush us off. It's still painful to see. . .pain.

An Auntie of note. . .

Oh, man. One of those senior moments...looking frantically for my glasses...which were on my face...

Got home at midnight last night after a good work session on a trade show set. I'll post some pictures soon.

Saturday went to a memorial service for the 92 year old aunt of a ministry friend of mine who is, herself, in her 70's.

This is quite a story. The auntie, C, was quite a woman. She married late in life because she tended her sick father. When she did marry, she married for over 40 years to a Christian man. They both ministered in many ways. C heard that many babies at a local county hospital were going home wrapped in newspapers, so she set about cranking out baby blankets and caps. Tons of them. She was a seamstress, an arts and crafts freak, a baker, and with no children of her own, was a grandparent to many neighbors and nieces and nephews. The love for her that was expressed at the service was amazing. Even more amazing, C had Alzheimer's, and she stayed in her home where she died peacefully last Monday. She was tended not only by her family members; neighbors shouldered much of the responsibility to keep her from going to a nursing home. She had round the clock care. Who of us would do this not only for our family. . . but for a neighbor?

What a testimony to truly walking the walk, both C and her neighbors and family! C reaped what she sowed, and I pray that her family and friends are blessed as well by their tender and faithful care.

I didn't know her, but I was truly honored and blessed to learn about her, and rejoice in a life well lived for Him.

I've never really liked clowns....

All of my life I have been afraid to really enjoy myself. Where does that come from? I really don't know. Some can identify with this, some can't. I think it comes from old rejection baggage and a lack of self-love. Wah. I always had this feeling in the back of my mind that if I am happy, something will come along and whap me down. I posted something like this a while ago about feeling like those whappy clowns that you can hit, they fall, bounce back up, etc.

I got some weird blood test results from the doctor, in fact he took several days to get back to me about them. He couldn't figure them out, either, but it looks like the lupus is taking a weird and unwanted turn. As much as he and I (never knew he wasn't a fan of pills!) don't want to use drugs too much, we agreed to a short course of prednisone and an alternate-day change on my thyroid meds. I'm dreading the side effects of the prednisone. . . but figure it will jazz me up to get stuff done in the next week!

Anyway, this isn't a pity-post. It's really about some changes in attitude that I'm going to make. I'm reading a book by Bernie Seigel, M.D. You've probably heard about it. . . Love, Medicine and Miracles is the title, I think. I ordered it a week or so ago, almost prophetically. As I've started it, it has really inspired me already. I'm not anywhere near what some of his patients have gone through. It's about exceptional patients who have healed themselves (we know the source of that healing, even though so far he hasn't taken a "God" stance) and defied the prognoses of doctors. Anyone dealing with any kind of disease issue could benefit from this. . .and people who might be afraid of the future of their health.

So, instead of engaging in panic mode, as is my usual M.O., I'm going to sit down and write out for myself a plan of enjoying my life, moving forward, and all the stuff that makes me so happy. . . like our Father, my family, my critters, my friends and all of you blogpals, and my work. We have to remember to, as I think Kansas Bob may post about, letting HIM REALLY take the reins. That whappy clown needs to be placed against a wall so he can't fall down, and we all need lean against the only One who matters!

Because, I really AM happy! :-) Have a blessed weekend. You are all so very wonderful!

If I wuz any better...

BruceD said, "Life is interesting, then it gets REAL interesting!" I read my last post...sounds like a nut house around here. Bruce then said it sounded like I'm okay, though.

I am! I'm all happy in my head! If I were any better, I'd be twins! Hope you're all the same!

Missing blogland....

I feel like I've been gone forever. Could we add about 12 more hours to the day?

My hubby's mom is in rehab, and that's been taking some time...she is 30 miles away. We spent our 24th anniversary Sunday battling weird traffic, rainstorm, and fatigue from working to get over to see her. Her first words were, "I figured you all had forgot about me." Man, that makes me crazy! ;-)

Oldest son's car is in the shop, so have been working on a set in the wee hours of the morning, coming home and letting him use the car to get to school...or driving him and picking up. How did people make it with one car? I seem to remember those days!

Subbed a couple days for an art teacher last week. In a science lab. With pencils, crayons, and paper. The teacher was packing up to trade with the Spanish teacher at another school for 9 weeks, so supplies were limited. It was fun. And interesting. The instructions for the youngers was to draw their family with these construction paper crayons on black paper, then when they were done, they could draw what they wanted. Things were going well, but I could see they were scurrying through everything and we'd have empty time. So, bright me suggests that some of them might want to share their pictures with the class. One little lass stands up and tells about her "Super Hamster"drawing...he was so cute with his little cape and little costume, and little cap on his little head...then she shows us the little poop coming out from behind him. Hmm. Thank you, dear. We then recited the word "appropriate," its meaning, etc. Ha! I strolled around and some kid came up and said that another kid was drawing "private parts." He was actually drawing, well...it wasn't inappropriate unless you looked at it just . . . so. Another kid drew a picture and labeled it "Naked Loin." I was about to toss in the towel when I realized he had drawn a lion without a mane. HA! This is so fun! :-) And funny! And no pukage!

Anyway...I miss you all and am going to catch up! Have a good one!