Friday, April 25, 2008

Well, I guess I'm journaling about my fun times at the elementary school.

I went in and they said "the child" was having a great day. I know that can turn on a dime, though. I had a feeling he was going to be trouble, and normally I would have prayed that off, but it happened so quickly. The teacher was in and out of the class talking with OTHER kids who were in trouble, and directed everyone to open their science books and discuss with others how heat is transferred. The child, "C" was looking at everything else. I told him to get his book out and he said no. I said, "First warning. Get your book out." He gets up and starts slamming his desk around and throwing stuff around. I'm fascinated, frankly, and tell him to stop-2nd warning for not complying with getting the book...he won't stop or comply, so I tell him to leave the room and take a walk. The teacher wants me to take his book, try to work on the assignment (ha) and maybe he could see the video at 2pm.

I follow him and we chat a bit. I ask him why he got angry over doing school work and that I had to mark him as one warning for disrespect of school property because he tossed his desk around. He gets mad and kicks a door. I tell him that's the second warning for disregard of property. (He gets 2 warnings for each part of behavior) I've already put in a call to the SpEd teacher. He grabs the clipboard pen-on-a-string and pulls it...just about pulling the clipboard with it, but I hold the clipboard because I'm afraid he'll get smacked in the face. Should have let him. He jumps over to me and grabs the clipboard and twists around with it in front of me. My finger is in the metal part. The SpEd teacher comes around seeing this scene and her first words are: "Honeeey, what's wrong?" He sticks out his lower lip and starts pouting. The teacher asks me about what happened. . .she says, "Did he 'tap' the door, or actually kick it?" My head is screaming, "It doesn't matter. He was disrespectful to school and me, and that is that." But, I tell her, "He kicked it." Which he did. So, she tells me, as he is turning lights off and on and sputtering obnoxiously, to go get someone in SpEd who is CPI trained (Crisis Prevention Intervention). No phones? So, I go. What do you think about this?

I found this online. I would have failed miserably on this because I don't remember any songs from "South Pacific."

Snow is streaming from the sky as a short yellow school bus pulls up to a red brick building that is well on the plus side of fifty years old. A young girl, approximately ten years old, exits the bus through an open window and runs down the pathway to the building. She hurls herself into the school and within a few feet finds her classroom. The ceiling of the class is gnarled with enormous steam pipes, anywhere from two to twelve inches in diameter. The pipes are already at work, grunting and hissing their way to heating the class. The girl grabs a pair of scissors and opens them at her throat. "I’ll kill myself now if you don’t sing a song from ‘South Pacific’." The kid’s eyes are wild and her greasy hair is matted to her forehead. I begin to hum a few bars of ‘Happy Talk’ as I calmly take the scissors from her hands. She quiets down almost immediately. I help her take off her thin coat and note that her feet do not have socks on them. Class has started on a Monday morning in an upstate New York public school.~~~Antoinette Magaletta McClure, teacher of emotionally disturbed kids and author of Pipe Dreams.


Happy Friday!

I can't make out what the words of the song are. If you know, and they are objectionable...please tell me! The kittens are way cute!!

Monday, April 21, 2008

Argggghhhh. . .

Update 4/23/08
You all have no idea how much you've encouraged me. Your prayers were felt. Yesterday was fine--which was kind of scary. I even got a couple of hugs, and he is on level 1 because of behavior the previous day (not because he was disobeying me....because of later incidences).
Today we worked and he has to work for 4 hours cumulative before he can return to the classroom. I was trying to explain the amount of time he had left...which was really good, but he misunderstood and started throwing a fit a couple of times, but he calmed down after 1 warning from me. Trying to make him see the things he is getting upset about are little things. He spent time with the psychologist this morning. I met the Dr. and he is concerned that I have no training (for my protection). Whatever. He quizzed me on hypothetical happenings and what I would do. Guess I passed.
The child was yelling when the Dr. was in the room and the Dr. said, "Hey, (name) that makes my ears hurt." I thought...I don't think that (name) cares if your ears hurt!
Anyway, Milly has it pegged. We're all about the "feelings" and the "feel good" etc., and not the accountability...and school is the one place these kids could have a stable existence...and the school gives away the security by giving the kids the power.
Anyway, thanks all. Blogworld rocks.

Okay....I've had about enough of the fun-at-school-for-very-little-pay. I was so out of it, I ran a red light today--no one around, but I was driving my husband's car, just dropped him off at the airport. Strange intersection, strange car, and didn't want to slam on the brakes, so went ahead. Light turned red, I was entering the intersection. Camera in operation, so it will probably take me 4 days to pay off a ticket. I haven't had a ticket in 22 years. Welcome to defensive driving. Serves me right. Red flag to pay attention. You all pay attention, too, 'k?

Anyway, they have stuck me with this emotionally disturbed child at school for around 3.5 hours a day. I always get put with the disturbed ones. I'M A SUB!!!! No other aide has him--or has EVER had him--for that length of time. He had a horrible weekend, violence in the family, and both parents arrested. Stepfather held knife to his little brother's neck. This kid told the stepfather that if he hurt his little brother, he'd kill him.
This kid is 9 years old. I know this is awful. But the school needs to be a safe, consistent, firm, and loving (truthful loving, not the fake variety) place for him.
Why am I in charge here? I watched this little fellow manipulate, disobey, hit kids, throw fits, break the rules, go into hiding, run, etc., in the halls. We're not supposed to chase him. We were hunting him down in the halls and he appeared behind me. I asked him what he was doing.
"Hiding from all of you."
"Let's go to the Diagnostic lab. Your teacher is looking for you."
He starts running in the hall toward the lab.
"Stop running. Walk."
"No! I don't have to listen to you."
"Yes, you do, and don't speak to me like that."
He stops in front of the fire extinguisher. He opens the door. He slowly starts reaching in. I'm half a hall away.
"Stop. Get your hands off of that."
"Yes. Close the door."
I'm up with him; he pulls his hand back. I close the door. The teacher comes up the hall. He runs to her. I say, "Stop running. Walk." The teacher says, "Where have you been sweetie? We've been so worried about you."
He throws out the lower lip and says, "I want to talk about this weekend." She smiles at me, knowingly. He wants to talk about it--isn't that wonderful? I can't say a word because he's standing there. I tell her when we're alone that he was about to pull out the fire extinguisher. She smiles and says, "Hmmm, I would say, when he does things like that: 'We don't want to do that--that would cause a lot of problems.'"

Kids like this don't scare me. They trouble me. He has done, however in a roundabout way, most of what I've ever told him to do.
The counselor was standing there and looking at me condescendingly. After all, what could I possibly know about handling kids like this? It's true, I haven't been trained in the "new" ways. So, why am I put in this position? Because no one else wants to do it, that's why.
Some folks think, maybe you're there to make a change.
Some's a God thing that you're there for those kids.
I think I'm being taken advantage of.
I'm taking a breather tonight, and praying about this mess. It's destroyed what little joy I was getting out of being there.

Saturday, April 12, 2008

Tree, school, exhaustion...

I have little time to scoot around the blogs lately, much less post, so thought I'd add my inane little excuse here.
I'm subbing full time till the end of the year as a special ed aide at an elementary school that is primarily Hispanic. It didn't used to be, but it is's the school my oldest stayed for about 3 years. . .many of the same teachers there. I kinda got roped into it---my ego played a part, too. They absolutely love me there, and how can ya not wanna hang somewheres they like you? The money is pitiful, really, because aides, who run around a school all day and deal with emotionally or mentally challenged kids are not worth much--apparently.
I'm speaking more Spanish now, and the children have stopped giggling at my pronunciation.
I seem to have a repoire with emotionally disturbed people. I'm not sure that's a good thing.
I'm exhausted and have no time for anything else. How do you full timers do it? I forgot how.
I'm catching every virus known to man.
I actually got a kick out of a fist-fight taking place near the cafeteria stage laden with cakes. I must admit, the anticipation was exhilarating! (No, no cake "stomping.")
I'm learning not to roll my eyes when I hear someone leading children in songs like:
I like me
I like me
I am special and
I like myself.
As if Kindergarteners need self-esteem boosts. They all seem fine to me in that arena.
So, between trees and school, and trying to keep my little business going....I'm pooped. I also feel like I haven't gotten enough God time. :-(

Thursday, April 10, 2008

Why I'm glad the back trees are gone. . .

Big storms last night. Think that was why I got the
"word" to remove the back ones. This one lost about
5 branches. No damage done. Praise the Lord.

Friday, April 04, 2008

Tuesday, April 01, 2008

Arizona Ash, please don't crash... down on me...

This awesome vid by Kathleen Kloba about sums it up. The trees were a blessing, and I feel REALLY guilty cutting them down now...but it has to be. They are having problems...and I'm looking at my yard with the sticks, loose branches that fell, and the leaves they drop in the Spring. Keep that in mind, and I'll get through Friday. Until then, enjoy this video. It pretty much sums it up, and the creepy thing is the yard and trees look kinda like mine!! All I can say is I didn't plant 'em!!